For God Glory and Gold!

Wednesday, September 29, 2004
Hero of the Day

N *drumroll* IT'S ME! I finally found the title to this song that i really like n it's called Hero of the Day! Yay! Life has been bad lately. Worse last sunday. My frens pissing me off over little
things. I' just dwelling on things i suppose. I shud stop being resentful.Alamak, ader org nak pakai laptop so i go now. I wunt be back soon so SELAMAT BERPUASA! N Selamat...Hari Raya!!!

These 2 don't mix; religion equals peace whereas war is destruction and pain. ALOT of pain. THat is why i do not understand why these terrorists claim to be doing this bombings in the name of God. Yesterday, my cousin frm America called. So i asked her about 911 n da situation over dere.

She told me of how she cried n cried when da bombings happened 3 years ago. SHe was confused, scared, sad n mad all at da same time. She prayed to Allah asking why, why did this happen? ARe they right? is dat de right ISlam? And then, she got a dream. I'm not saying dat de dream is real or anything but it's intense. She dreamt my grandma (whom passed away 7 yrs ago) came to her n said that there's gonna be a big change in ISlam. SOmething's gonna happen, not sure what. But she also said to not be afraid cos thoses terrorits are wrong. We are right. In Islam, u are not allowed to kill people, u're not allowed to kill urself.

Then she had a 2nd dream in which she was flying in a dark place then she came to a cave. iNside ade benda berhala; u noe those things ppl used to worship n pray to before NAbi Mohd s.a.w came. So there were priests n alot of ppl like praying to it. ANd a voive said to my cousin to destroy those statues. So she did. N those ppl came running after her n she ran out of the cave. Outside she saw ALOT of ppl fighting, chaos, blood everywhere. then there was a tent and inside was a group of ppl; men on one side, women on the other. They were wearing white n was zikiring, ngaji-ing and praying. N the voice said, "Look, there's 2 side to Islam now. 2 groups of ppl so different; the fighting ones n the peaceful ones. the ones in the tent are the real Islam." ISlam is a peaceful religion, we do not go around killing ppl. Then the voice said "Rasulullah cries EVERYDAY because of his umat. He sees them fighting and he feels such extreme sadness u CANNOT imagine." then my cousin felt something heavy drop inside her heart; like a very heavy burden. N she knew she was feeling what Rasulullah is feeling. She dropped to the ground and started crying. The sadness was overwhelming. Then those who were fighting saw her n came over n beat her rabak giler. She was bleeding but she can't even feel the pain of the blows cos the pain n sadness in her heart outweighed them.

She woke up crying n she continued to cry for like 10 minutes. N for a few wks after dat, she wud cry every time she thinks abt the dream cos she can still feel what Nabi s.a.w feels. When i heard this, i was so darn shocked! I didn't know what to say. i tried so hard to keep the lump in my throat down. I wanted to just sit down n cry n cry. I can't describe the feeling. Behind me, my family was happily walking around, talking n laughing. Before i cud finish talking to her, the line got cut off.

This morning i told my frens abt it n i cudn't stop shaking. Ya Allah, i feel so , so. i dunno. Look at the kids in Russia. I wanted to cry when i saw these kids running while the gunmen shot them down like animals. I wonder y i dunt just cry. We are all his umat; he feels EVERYTHING we feel n he cries when we cry.We are not so alone after all.

But this terrorists really think that they are doing the right thing. Why shudn't dey? They probably haf been brainwashed n haf seen too many Muslims around de world getting slaughtered while leaders keep mum. However Islam is not about killing. I wish sum1 wud cum n help us.

*~*Excuse me While I Tend to How I Feel @
10:54:00 AM

Wednesday, September 08, 2004

Of Holidays n Hair

Hey, i went for a haircut on Friday n it turned out HORRIBLE! I'm so traumatised! My mum said it looks like "bulu tikus!" Uwah!!! Bloody hell, i never get the haircut i want. It's not much of a holiday now; all i do is sleep n rot in front of the TV.Ginger's still not back. I suppose he's gone forever..Grrr..OH, oh i watched this movie on FRiday channel i called Sleepers. Yes, Sleepers, not Slippers like wad my sister tot.The movie is AWEsome! Abt 4 boys whu got sent 2 a detention centre den they got raped, abused like rabak giler! I still think abt it..Ewww

On mOnday, all my sisters were hm den we all went nuts man. Dance to "lagu hindustan" lah n Michael Jackson's songs! Yeah, beat it, just beat it! Iza is damn hilarious. Outrageous man dis girl. Wad wud i do without my sisters. Probably study more n watch less TV...I was blind all day yesterday cos my stupid lense dropped out frm da frame. I can't believe the way they kill those poor chickens, just stuff them "hidup2" into the plastic bags. Then the bags were like wriggling on the ground. Poor birds, "Whu am i, pretending not to hear them squawk!"..It makes me almost want 2 be a vegetarian.Almost.Stupid laptop is going all crazy on me so i'll just go now..Hey, my frens are finally here!

Oh, do u noe how hard it is to plan an outing with ur frens???? I AM NEVER GOING TO PLAN AN OUTING FOR THEM AGAIN! they were all like, eh, let's go out during the holidays mada, come on ah, PLEASE? *bats eyes* So i said, sure, okay. PLan here, plan there and kedebak kedebuk, they couldn't make it. I cud rip out all their hair! Argh! ok, now tata.

Ps: I LOVE BRAD PITT! there, i confessed! I must NOT like him! He's so common....BUt he's so darn CUTE!!!! ARGH!!"Immortality! Take it! It's Urz!" haha, familiar anyone?

*~*Excuse me While I Tend to How I Feel @
10:36:00 AM

Thursday, September 02, 2004

Vomit Sessions

I just vomited. No, not the i-haf-just-emptied-e-contents-of-my-stomach kind of vomit. Rather, emotional vomit. U know, when ur're feeling down, angry, depressed or wadever, u take it out on ur frens, family. U affect ppl around u bcoz u feel bad. To let ur emotions override u n to let it spill out. Dats called vomitting. Dats wad i read in dis book anyway. I haf got to control my temper. i can boil over so quickly n cool down just as fast. Stupid fart tart. I miss my Ginger. Well, it was bound to happen. I shud get myself a tortoise. Dunt think they wud run away frm hm too..

And to my darling Nis & Fas. Dunt be sad abt de competition. It's pointless really. Wad happened on Tuesday was these 2 lovely girls were sobbing n sniffling on the couch at the library n I thought that they were having a really bad case of FLU! God, i can't believe myself. I was so damn shocked to see them both crying. i thought somebody died. My heart did a backflip. Sheesh...

I hate my blog. But it's suppose to be for my eyes only so whu cares wad it looks like? Da di da di dum...Oh, let's do sum bitching. There was this librarian whu was being a tactless, insensitive wart poopy head! Here i am, trying to comfort this 2 girls in my soft, barely audible voice, n she was in the background nagging about sumthing. I ignored her. She CAme BACK and said "Eh, kalau nak lepak2, jgn duduk sini lah.." and sumthing else but i tuned out. Her tone was bloody sarcastic it made me want to rip out her bloody friggin hair! URGH! Too bad she was my elder n i'm suppose to respect her bla bla bla. N also bcos i was hugging my frens. God, she's such a bloody makcik. Can't she see we are in distress? N we weren't wailing around the library or anything, pulling books off the shelves. Then i did a childish thing. I MESSED up the books which she had just neatly put in place. Serve the lil witch right! HMPH! How dare she judge us? n she was being all nice to this malay couple just cos they had their sch books out...Oy makcik, gi cermin muker kau lah oy!!!! For wad, i dunno. Check for warts or sumthing. Ok, finish venting so bye bye. till next time.

*~*Excuse me While I Tend to How I Feel @
12:38:00 PM

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